Let's Review: The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

Welcome back to the Geekdom, I’ll be your Guide. I have a confession to make. I have never read The Hobbit, nor have I read The Lord of the Rings. I know I’m a terrible person; I just haven’t gotten around to it yet. My knowledge of the LOTR world is limited to what I have seen in the films and my editor’s extremely thorough knowledge, but even I can tell what an odd move it is to turn this one book into an epic action packed trilogy. Like many of you, I wasn’t sure if what I was about to watch was going to be any good or not, due to the nature of what it was. So without further ado, let’s review The Hobbit.

The Negative

 

Now I saw this movie with my editor and therefore everything the film had gotten wrong about the plot was described to me in fine detail. Suffice it to say if you are a major fan of the book, be prepared to find that the movie has changed a few of the details. This is not to say that every addition of change was a bad thing, nor necessarily incorrect within the LOTR universe, but a good majority of the changes were created for extending the plot so that it could be made into a trilogy. In my book, padding is never the highlight of a story.

The high definition of this film was both its blessing and its curse. Every image was really sharp and clearly defined, down to the make-up effect mistakes and poor CGI. At certain times you could see where the actor’s leg would end and the fake hobbit foot began. There was a thick ring around his lower leg that would give it away; the issue was that it was hard not to see it due to the high definition. The high definition in the film made everything look really good, but also pointed out ever error.  The other problem stemmed from the CGI. I personally couldn’t look at the Goblin King without seeing a blobbing mess of poor CGI effects. While the high definition looked fantastic, it also made all of its technical flaws rather glaring.

The Dwarves. By the end of the film I couldn’t tell you much about any of them, none of them were developed that well, other than the leader Thorin. To be fair this is something shared by a good number of stories that have a large main cast. When a main cast is too big some of the characters have a tendency to be overlooked. While I am certain that these characters will get more development over the course of the next two films, I can’t help but think that the Fellowship of the Ring did a much better job at introducing a large main cast than this movie.

Lastly, they tried really hard to make the ending epic in order to justify ending the film there. The final action sequence is way too over the top with extreme amounts of slow motion just to get you to understand how much of an epic fight this is and why it’s the perfect stopping point. This falls under the same issue of padding in order to extend the story, but this scene was incredibly unashamed of its padding nature. (Also my editor informs me that if you have read the book it is almost ridiculous how epic this part is, especially when it removes most of the actual villains who were in the scene).

The Positive

This is not Lord of the Rings. Don’t go into this movie expecting to see more Lord of the Rings. This is an epic fantasy film whose tone is far more for the light-hearted. Most people would look at that as a bad thing, but I personally see it as the film’s shining aspect. The film is allowed to not take itself as seriously as the LOTR trilogy did, granting it the ability to visit the more fantastical elements of this world. I couldn’t see the rock giants sequence fitting in too well with the LOTR trilogy but with The Hobbit it feels like a neat addition to a fascinating adventure.

The acting was amazing as was expected. I feel special praise should be given to Sir Ian McKellan for returning to the role of Gandalf but not entirely being the Gandalf we knew. Gandalf is a fairly somber character in the LOTR trilogy but that was because he was facing such dark times. This Gandalf is hamming up the scene with some of the most humorous dialogue. This added to the effect that this wasn’t just a copy of Lord of the Rings, the journey will be almost entirely different.

The music in the film was beautifully orchestrated. ‘Of course it was, this is Lord of the Rings you’re talking about’ you say, but the reason I make particular note of it here is because of the few songs performed by the main cast. The songs add their own particular elements to the film. ‘Far Over The Misty Mountain Cold’ in particular adds such a powerful daunting element to the night before the first day of the journey. Some of the songs were taken directly from LOTR, but the new additions were a great asset to the film.

The action sequences were spread lightly throughout the movie, but whenever they appeared it was always incredibly fast paced. While I didn’t like the Goblin King’s CGI, the entire goblin chase sequence was an amazing scene to watch. The screen was always busy with our heroes sprinting through this world of rickety walkways while goblins climbed on all the walls. It truly made the film feel like a fun thrill ride from start to finish.

In Conclusion

Our return to Middle Earth was a little bumpier than expected, but still an enjoyable return none the less. I wish the film didn’t have as much padding as it did, and the high definition made it suffer more than it added, but the acting was fantastically splendid and I look forward to the next one. 3.9 out of 5.

Let's Review: Wreck-It Ralph

Hello and welcome back to the Geekdom, I will be your Guide. I was really looking forward to this film….sort of. To understand my hesitation is to recognize that this isn’t a Pixar film. Disney hasn’t had the best track record for CGI films when they make them themselves.  This reputation would have kept me from this film except for one thing…..IT LOOKED SO COOL! How awesome is it to see all of these classic video game characters within the same film. So did my excitement beat my initial judgment? Let’s review Wreck-It Ralph.

The Negative

 

The issue with this film is that it is far too predictable. A Disney children’s film is never going to try anything truly drastic or new in this day and age. While the premise is a really neat idea the actually plot of the movie is nothing we haven’t seen before. We are presented most of the problems that will, rest assuredly, resolve itself by movie end. By this I mean, Ralph rather bluntly says why he is unhappy, and then resolves that problem. You can even tell who the main villain is from a mile away. I won’t say it ruined the film for me; it’s just that it was hard not to predict the outcome of the film after the initial 10 minutes.

There are multiple game worlds that Ralph enters in the movie. Most of the film is spent within the Sugar Rush world which is basically Mario Kart fused with Candy Land. The first 20 min of Sugar Rush is stuffed with candy puns. Some are good and some are bad, but it is just way too much. My friends would describe me as a lover of really bad puns, so when I say it has way too many puns, it really does.

This guy, Mayor Gene. Re-watch the scene where Ralph returns back to his game before the final act where he gets confronted with Mayor Gene. I honestly need someone to explain how in this scene Mayor Gene is in the right. If you cannot explain to me how Mayor Gene is right in this scene, then you should be just as confused as I was regarding the moral theme of this movie. I honestly just don’t get it.

The Positive

By the end of the film, I had to keep reminding myself that what I saw wasn’t a Pixar film, that what I saw was actually significantly better than the Pixar film, Brave, that was released in the same year. Wreck-It Ralph was an amazing film and I simply enjoyed every moment of it.

The humor in the film was a really key piece that kept the movie going for me. I may have complained about the puns in the candy section earlier, but that was just one segment of the film. The style of the humor and animation struck me as the kind you would see in a 16 bit parody video online. This sense of humor was very refreshing to see in a children’s film.

A difficulty found in most films is creating a new game that actually looks like a game. I’ve seen it before and you’ve seen it before. Anytime a character is sitting there and has to act like they are really engaged in the crappy CGI the effects team were able to whip up at the last second, it doesn’t look like any game anybody would be caught dead playing. Not only did this movie feature new games that actually looked like fun to play they also felt like games I had previously enjoyed. Sugar Rush in particular felt like a Mario Kart game with a candy theme. Watching the film, I really wanted to go home and play that race course on my game. This effect is what truly won me over toward the film. This really felt like a video game story with a truly ingrained video game atmosphere.

In Conclusion

This film really surprised me. I was expecting at least a watchable movie, but I hadn’t anticipated how much I would truly love this film. This film brought back a very nostalgic feeling for the gamer in me and I would love to see more films like these being produced by Disney. 4.2 out of 5.

Let's Review: Skyfall

Welcome back to the Geekdom, I’ll be your Guide. For those of you that believed that the sky would fall before my next review came out, you’re half right. The 50 year anniversary of James Bond films, and I’ve barely seen any of them, which I find highly regrettable but it is on my ‘to-watch’ list. So how did the celebration of James Bond live up to the legacy? Let’s review Skyfall.

The Negative

I have only seen a handful of the Bond film series, not out of disinterest mostly because I just haven’t gotten to it. Due to this film being a celebration of Bond, it was packed full of classical Bond movie references, most of which I just didn’t get. This film was created for the long time fans that have seen all of the older films. This doesn’t mean that I didn’t enjoy the film, simply that I would get more out of it if I decided to watch the film again after viewing the entire series.

A big theme of the film is age, which is understandable seeing how it’s the anniversary of Bond. References throughout the film keep pointing out how the 00 program is becoming outdated and how Bond himself is simply a relic of an older time. This theme is one of the greatest pieces of this film, but it feels really out of place with Daniel Craig’s Bond. The last two films we got with Craig were all about how his Bond was a rookie and how MI6 couldn’t fully trust him because of his loose cannon behavior. To move from Bond the rookie to Bond the old war relic felt really odd.

I’ve heard varying opinions from people on how they felt about the main villain, some really liked him and others….didn’t. I personally felt like he represented the overall tone of the film. This was the first Daniel Craig Bond movie with a noticeably lighter tone, this was a fun film. As such the main villain does come off as a bit goofy. He is flamboyantly gleeful about his evil ways and recalls some of the sillier villains from older Bond films. I personally felt like his character was one of the more ridiculous parts of the film, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing but you can judge for yourself.

The Positive

This was an incredibly fun film. The previous two Daniel Craig films were more noted for their gritty tones than past bond films; while this approach is perfectly fine I really enjoyed the lighter tone of this film. The action sequences were far more outlandish and goofier than previous Craig films, especially the chase scene that started the film, but it was this take that endeared me to the film. This was a celebration of James Bond so why not embrace the entirety of that world, even the sillier bits.

A running theme in this film was that the world that Bond exists and fights in a world of shadows. The reason of the 00 program is because they fight those who would call the shadows their home. This theme is reflected upon in most of the film’s best fight sequences, with Bond and his opponent engaging in battle within heavily shaded areas with only their silhouettes being illuminated by the lights of the background. These scenes are beautifully shot and were some of my absolute favorite moments in the film.

 

The relationship between Bond and M is thoroughly examined in this film. Both are regarded as old war machines that have no place in this new world, but it is the theme of the war in the shadows that continue to show their importance to the audience and later the British Government. Daniel Craig plays a wounded Bond in this film, who has grown tired of war but returns to life anyways in order to aid M in this current attack. M’s faith in Bond, despite his current weakness he is still the best man for the job, is a real highlight of the film. It was nice to see that despite how at odds they were in the past two films that they still held each other in such high regard and that their relationship was more than just boss and agent.

In Conclusion

Despite not having seen most of the previous James Bond movies, I feel I can still say that this was a wonderful celebration of the series. Skyfall is a grand representation of the world of the Bond film series and why after all these years we keep coming back to the theaters to watch another one of his feats. If you haven’t seen this film yet, go out and see it while you still have the chance. 4.7 out of 5.

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Top 10 Skeletons

Hello and welcome back to the Geekdom. Yes friends it’s that wonderful time of the season again. A time of sharing, caring, and scaring the living daylights out of little trick or treaters. The most classic of monsters in my opinion is the skeleton.  One of the purest symbols of death, the skeleton has long been used for fear, which is why I decided to make this list. As per usual I have my runner-ups:

-Death (Family Guy)
-Blazing Skull (Invaders)
-Death Jr. (Death Jr.)

And now let’s get into the Top 10 Skeletons

10-Blight (Batman Beyond)

In the not too distant future of Gotham, Batman retired from his life of crime fighting and disappeared from the public eye as Bruce Wayne. In his stead, Wayne Industries was taken over by the corrupt businessman, Derek Powers.  Derek becomes infected with a deadly mutagenic gas that he had developed when the new Batman stops him from using it as a weapon. To save his life, Derek undergoes a radical radiation experiment. The experiment succeeds but not before transforming him into a radioactive monster. Going by the name Blight, he now spends his days trying to gain vengeance against Batman.

9 -Dead Tom (Muppet Treasure Island)

‘DEAD TOM’S DEAD! LONG JOHN SHOT HIM!’
‘…….but Dead Tom ‘as always been dead. That’s why he’s called Dead Tom.’

I…………………………………………………………………….
Love this joke……………………..
That’s it, next one

8 -Stal (The Legend of Zelda)

The Stal is a species of re-animated monstrous skeletons. In Ocarina of Time, once the sun goes down the Stal come out. Swarming in packs, the Stal can quickly overwhelm any hero who chooses to stay out at night for too long.  The Stals come in a variety of sizes from the tiny Stalchild, to the adult sized Stalfos Knights, to gigantic beasts such as the Stallord, each being more powerful than the last. The Stals have always represented a challenge to the Hero of Time.

7 –Captain Hector Barbossa (Pirates of the Caribbean)

Originally the first mate of Captain Jack Sparrow, Barbossa and the crew mutinied when Jack revealed the location of the Aztec gold. Having plundered the gold, Barbossa and the crew became cursed as skeletal beings with desires that can never be met. Driven mad by this lack of fulfillment, Barbossa and his damned crew set out to collect every piece of gold back in order to undo the curse.  He eventually succeeds in this goal only to be shot dead moments later, though his rotting corpse was resurrected by the sea goddess, Calypso, in order to aid her in breaking her own curse.

6 –Eliza Faust (Shaman King)

Dr. Johann Faust VIII was a happy man. He slaved in his medical studies to be able to find a cure for his dearest love Eliza. Eventually he was able to develop a cure and save her life. Faust and Eliza married and set up a clinic together, living immensely happy lives together. All brought to a tragic end when a thief with a gun, shot Eliza in the head. Going mad from the loss, Faust delved into his distant ancestor’s (Dr. Faustus) supernatural dealings. Using his newfound powers, Faust is able to animate his wife’s skeleton through the power of her soul.  Not being able to fully resurrect his dear Eliza, Faust enters the Shaman King tournament in a bid to use the god like powers to bring her back to him.

5-Lord Fear (Ace Lightning)

One of the most feared beings in the Sixth Dimension, Lord Fear was once good friends with the hero Ace Lightning before a terrible accident lead him to his current state. Lord Fear now seeks to use the fabled artifact, The Amulet of Zoar, in order to conquer all of dimensional space. Running with a small band of villains, Lord Fear operates in the Carnival of Doom, battling the Lightning Knights with his magically empowered staff.

4 -Skeletor (He-Man and the Masters of the Universe)

Ooooooooooh Skeletor. I have no words for someone as silly as you. Cited as the archenemy of He-Man, I honestly can’t see why he represents such a threat. I mean really, the guy can’t even come up with a strong insult on a day to day basis. Skeletor’s main goal is to break into Castle Grayskull and steal its ancient secrets that will allow him to conquer Eternia, but we all know this guy is never going to reach his goal.

3 -Grim (The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy)

In an attempt to win the life of their pet hamster, Billy and Mandy won a game of Limbo against the Grim Reaper, and consequently won his servitude to them. Now Grim exists in his day to day experience having to obey the whims of the sadistically cruel Mandy and the immaturely insane Billy. Grim wishes nothing more than to be free of these two afflictions but as of yet has not found a way to break free of his contract.

2 -Brook (One Piece)

Brook was once a member of the Rumbar Pirates. During an assault be a rival crew, the Rumbar Pirates managed to defeat the crew but were all badly poisoned. Being a pirate crew of musicians, the Rumbar Pirates spent their final moments reciting the song Bink’s Sake. The entire crew passed away, but having eaten the devil fruit, Yomi Yomi, Brook gained the ability to return his soul to this plane of existence. Unfortunately, Brook lost track of where his ship and body had drifted to. Finding it years later, Brooks' body had been reduced to nothing but a skeleton, but his soul was still able to possess it.

1 -Jack Skellington (The Nightmare Before Christmas)

‘Wont' ya please make way for a very special guy;
Our man jack is King of the Pumpkin patch
Everyone hail to the Pumpkin King now!’

Jack Skellington has become an icon. He is a person who is well liked by most and has nothing wrong going on in his life, yet still finds himself unfulfilled, which has left him in a slightly depressive state, which makes him so easily connectable. This journey to find himself has allowed countless people to connect to him as we have all felt this pain one way or another. Jack’s failed attempt to reinvent himself through Christmas doesn’t throw him into a deeper stupor, quite the opposite, it reinvigorates him and he begins to see the joy he took in his old life again, inspiring others to see the joy in their own lives as well.

I’m the Guide, thanks for reading and Happy Halloween.

Top 10 Fictional Deities

Gasp! A new post from the Guide to Geekdom! Don’t ask how or why or what the status is on the video reviews, just know that this is an act of God that has allowed me to write. Speaking of God or rather Gods, throughout fiction there have been many instances of the use of fictional deities. Some can control time and space while others run the threads of reality itself. This has leaded me to make this list. As per usual I have a few runners ups:

 -The Great Spirit (Shaman King)
-Gozer (Ghostbusters)
-Arceus (Pokemon)

Now without another few month hiatus, here are the Top 10 Fictional Deities.

10 – Raiden (Mortal Kombat)

 

Thunder god and defender of Earthrealm, Raiden has been a mainstay within the Mortal Kombat series since the beginning. Raiden is willing to sacrifice anything to help save the denizens of Earthrealm, even surrendering his godly essence and immortality on a number of occasions just to compete in the competitions that will decide Earthrealm’s fate. In the newly rebooted Mortal Kombat universe, Raiden of the old universe sends a message to his past self to alter history in the attempt to save Earthrealm from Armageddon (or to try and save the series from another bad sequel).

9 – Azulongmon (Digimon)

 

One of the Digimon Sovereigns, Azulongmon is the defender of the East quarter of the Digiworld. Being one of the caretakers of the Digiworld, Azulongmon has many abilities that allow him to maintain the structure of his reality as well as being able to extend his power into other realms. Story wise, Azulongmon granted our heroes the ability to digivolve in the human world which allowed them to defend the border between both worlds. Azulongmon remains an important figurehead in the Digiworld, for his departure would mean the partial breakdown of reality.

8 – The Golden Goddesses (The Legend of Zelda)

 

 Creators of the sacred Triforce, the three Golden Goddesses are one of the most powerful recurring elements of the Zelda universe. The trinity is comprised of Din the goddess of Power, Farore the goddess of Courage, and Nayru the goddess of Wisdom. According to the mythology of the Ocarina of Time game, the Golden Goddesses were the creators of the land of Hyrule, leaving behind the Triforce as a symbol and representation of their power.

7 – Mata Nui (Bionicle)

 

The Great Beings created all of existence, and to rule in their stead they created a great robot that would monitor and control the universe as the Great Spirit. This was how the mighty being Mata Nui was created. Given the purpose of bringing balance to the universe, Mata Nui used his body to house his people giving them all the resources they needed and in return the people worshipped him as well as maintaining his vital functions. Given the power of the Mask of Light, Mata Nui is able to bless his people with the essence of life.

6 – The Phoenix Force (X-Men)

 

Created from the fires of creation, The Phoenix Force is a manifestation of life and reincarnation. The Phoenix’s purpose is to destroy obsolete pieces of the universe and remake them anew. To accomplish this goal, The Phoenix possesses mortal beings of great power and amplifies their power infinitely.  In this process the person being possessed is consumed by the corruption of the Phoenix’s purpose and becomes an entity of darkness. The passion of the Phoenix takes over and they are consumed with the need to destroy and rebuild the universe into something it deems as better. The only way to defeat it is to kill the person it is possessing. Unfortunately, being an entity of reincarnation, The Phoenix Force is never gone for long.

5 – Dream (The Sandman)

 

Dream of the Endless. Dream is one of seven infinitely powerful beings known as The Endless. These ancient beings are personifications of aspects of the universe. Dream is the lord of the dream realm controlling all aspects that do not exist within reality. Dream is an incredibly flawed character who suffers from a very large ego and stuffy personality. After being imprisoned for 70 years, Dream breaks free of his cell a new man and sets out to right the many wrongs he has committed in his endless years.

4 – Primus (Transformers)

 

The Lord of Light. Primus was brought into existence by the sentient core of the universe. Primus’ task was to defend the universe against the God of Darkness, Unicron, who had previously consumed other universes. Primus engaged Unicron in battle, but could only bring their fight to a standstill. Tricking the Dark God, Primus trapped both their spirits within giant metal asteroids, forcing them to maintain a corporeal state. Whereas Unicron reconfigured himself into an immense machine used to consume the planets and the universe, Primus decided to become a planet. In his new state, Primus created life whose purpose he gave them to defend the universe and defeat Unicron once and for all. Thus, Primus became the Transformer home world, Cybertron.

3 – Darkseid (Superman)

 

Darkseid is the ruler of the planet Apokolips and is considered to be one of the most powerful beings in the DC universe. Darkseid is one of the immortal New Gods as well as being worshipped as a God of Death by his people and for good reason. Darkseid is fueled by the power of The Omega Effect, a nearly unstoppable energy force that allows him to erase any living organism from existence. He can utilize this effect through beams from his eyes of which he has pinpoint control over, being able to curve the energy beams in any direction. Darkseid remains one the hardest foes that Superman may never overcome.

2 – Galactus (Fantastic Four)

 

The World Devourer. Honestly, do you really need any more than that? Really? Okay fine I’ll tell you about Galactus. Galan of the planet Taa was the last living being in the previous universe before the Big Bang that occurred. Galan was consumed by the energies of the Big Crunch that ended the existence of the previous universe. Incubating in these energies, Galan was fused with the very essence of the cosmos and became the entity known as Galactus. Existing on higher cosmic level, Galactus became the aspect of the universe representing the end. Galactus is overwhelmed by an insatiable hunger that leads him to consume planets, eventually leading to the end of the current universe. To aid him in this quest, Galactus occasionally imbues his Power Cosmic into mortal beings to act as his heralds, leading him to planets that have reached the end of their cycle.

1 – Truth (Fullmetal Alchemist)

 

“I am what you call the world. Or perhaps the universe, or perhaps God, or perhaps truth, or perhaps all, or perhaps one, and I am also you.”

When you tread on God’s domain, prepared to get burned. For alchemists who appear on God’s domain through the use of alchemy will find themselves confronted by an all white being outlined by shadows. The Gate will open behind you and pull you in. Truth will then grant you exactly what you wanted in this venture, infinite knowledge of alchemy, but in exchange for this action, you must lose something of dire importance to you. This is the law of alchemy, Equivalent Exchange. So beware all who attempt to enter God’s Domain, the sacrifice you suffer will never be worth it.

I’m the Guide to Geekdom, and hopefully it won’t take another act from God to hear from me again soon.

The Long Summer Hiatus

I feel like I shouldn't promise you anything right now, but on the off-hand chance that I actually do finish one of my projects or reviews, you can look forward to seeing them soon. I have almost completed filming of my first video review and in my off time I have been writing other reviews. So when I do start updating again, expect a lot of it, at least that is my hope.



and hopefully that is teaser enough for what I have coming
-The Guide